Friday, March 13, 2015

Explosion of emotion!

Today I popped into a local eatery for lunch. I ordered a sandwich that I was very excited to enjoy. I haven't been sleeping well this week - but I made it through the week (almost)! My emotions are ready to bubble out at ANY time.

I have read a LOT of blogs and articles about deployments and what to expect. One of the great ones that stands out in my head is this one - Why I wish Your Husband Would Deploy. Today I had a first experience - it was with the waitress of the lunch place. When I mentioned in conversation that my DH was deployed, she said "I wish my husband would leave for a year." This comment may seem innocent from the civilian side of things, but I burst into tears. I would give ANYTHING to have him back at my side.

It took me a minute to pull myself together, but things flash through my head. I'd love to be able to boss him around to take out the trash, I want to feel his body heat in bed to warm my cold toes. I want him to help me put my jacket on, kiss my forehead, open my car door for me, fight with him about stupid little things, listen to him laugh on the phone with his friends, talk to him about whether or not we should buy a raffle ticket for some random prize, eat the crust on his pizza, put my arms around his body and hug him and to be able to kiss his soft loving lips. I would give anything to be close to him again.

Re-reading that paragraph, it's the little things. Don't get me wrong though! There are times that I just want DH to be quiet and stop arguing with me, or times I just want space for a few hours from him. Overall though, I miss him and I want him home! I have reached out to a lot of the wives I know through his different commands of days past. I am very lucky that he set me up with a network of people I can talk to about this whole situation. It's always funny when the guys give their opinions also! If I listened to the men, it would be all naked pictures lining his care packages! That's not happening - absolutely not.

So this week I also called my Doctor to get in for the NaPro surgeries. They are contacting the insurance company and they will get back to me to schedule. The things I have read online regarding the Ovarian Wedge surgery say that people have the highest success rate in the first 6 months after the surgery. So maybe before the summer I will go, and then DH return should fall in that 6 month window somewhere! I hope....